Considering your relationship, think about the countless choice points there are in a single day. We all have those moments where we can choose to act in one way or another, choose to say one thing vs another...
What are you doing with your choice points? Do they support or degrade your relationship? Or perhaps they…
Consider how much the presence of absence of trust can impact your relationship? It's a critical element of what I often refer to as "emotional safety," that which ideally
allows for a safe haven in each other. John Gottman, PhD recently completed another in a long line of books about the research behind what makes or…
I see many couples who are in a rut. They are buried by the chaos of life, family, work, social obligations, kids, school sports and taking care of the dog (or cat, or goldfish). The bottom line is that many of us are struggling with monotony and expected routines. As important as structure is to…
There are a number of signs that can point to a need to "get right" with yourself so you can be right in a relationship; a sense of desperation in relationship-seeking, your mood dependent on partner's mood, a tendency to pick partners who need to be "rescued," intimacy problems or a general lack of trust…
No matter what the other does or says, you each are solely responsible for your responses. This may seem counter-intuitive to you, particularly if your mate behaves in outrageous ways but couples who successfully manage their own emotional reactivity and can keep physiologically regulated (and not "rage" for example) can more effectively work through disagreements. …
Are you and your partner spending time with positive, upbeat people? Research has shown that emotions are contagious!
Those you choose to surround yourself with have more impact on your relationship than you might think. Do an inventory of all of your friends, couples you spend time with and other people you come into contact with. …