Skip to content Skip to footer

The bottom line is emotional safety

Think of emotional safety as the glue that binds intimate relationships (and other close connections). It’s not a simple term but rather one that encompasses many aspects and is critical to healthy, secure and loving relationships.

The question is how much (or little) each partner feels heard, understood, validated, empathized with, prioritized, respected, trust and overall cared for by each other. The impact of a lack of emotional safety is resentment and disconnection, both which can kill your relationship.

The way you make improvements involves some steps:

  • Clarity around what aspects of emotional safety are taking a hit for one or both of you.
  • Identifying the behaviors that led to this.
  • Learn what you need from each other to make change.

This can be challenging to accomplish on your own, especially if your communication has not been great and there are a lot of built up negative feelings or if one person in the relationship won’t acknowledge the issue or refuses to look at their own role.

The bottom line for so many of the issues that couples have is emotional safety. I help couples make improvements together and individuals who have partners that don’t get it, for whatever reason, and they’d like to try to make changes on their own.

Marin Couples Therapy

Marin Individual Therapy

Outside of Marin but in California? Check out my California Online Therapy services.

I’d like to reach out to Lisa to schedule now.

Not quite ready for therapy but would like feedback and guidance by me? See my online chat Ask Lisa Consultation service on LoveAndLifeToolbox.com.

author avatar
Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT
Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT has a private practice in Marin County (Larkspur), CA., working with individuals and couples in-office or via tele-health for those in California. Lisa is also the creator of LoveAndLifeToolbox.com with articles and tools in support of emotional health and relationships. A frequent media consultant, she has appeared online in CNN, HuffingtonPost, Shape, Men’s Health and others. She lives in Mill Valley, California, loves nature, travel and is an avid tennis player.